Hymenoplasty or Guilt Conscience or Stamping Male Chauvinism?

If you are a software engineer and if you are lucky enough to have some spare time for yourself then most of the times a bug (sorry! I am a software engineer), which I prefer to call the bug of creativity, creeps in your mind. The thought that this heavy workload might turn me into a dumb IT professional sends shivers down my spine. So everyday when I return to my flat (this is what I prefer to call it, some people pronounce it as home also) and switch on the TV or read the newspaper for that matter, I look for reasons to keep my thought process going on or if I have to say it differently I try to feel that I can think of other better things in my life than about my code and my appraisals!!!

Last Wednesday when I was watching a news channel (have been told by fellow bloggers not to take the names directly), there was a euphoric discussion going on ‘hymenoplasty’, an operation which made it possible for women to regain their virginity. Botox, breast enlargement or liposuction are passé. The new cosmetic surgeries are vaginal reconstruction and hymenoplasty. It costs anywhere between Rs 1-2.5 lakh in US and UK while the same is done in India for Rs 10,000-20,000. I never knew till that point that it was possible but well I guess its right that science has made a huge progress. Doctors were telling how there was a rush among women now a days to get this operation done and how they were requested to keep their identity a secret for the reasons which do not require the knowledge of thermodynamics for us to guess. In spite of being a male this thought enough was sufficient to get my creative juices flowing. The correspondent finally concluded by saying that this progress that the field of medicine has made has given some reason to cheer to those women who are trying to put their past behind and start their life afresh!!!Cut the crap dear…

Why is a woman’s virginity such a big issue for all and sundry?? There is even a ritual called ‘kunwari puja’ which is performed on the 9^th day of Durga puja in which has the requirement of a virgin along with a male Brahmin, and yes he does not need to be a virgin. In some Arabian countries an even more wonderful ritual is performed. After the first night of marriage, the senior members of the family take the bed sheet (yes if u tried to guess the colour you are right. It’s white!!) which has stains of blood on it as a result of the love making session that has been performed by the couple on it and parade throughout the city as they think it to be something auspicious. I am not saying all this to hurt the sentiments of people belonging to any particular country or religion but to show that even mythology puts a lot of stress on a women being virgin. And we all are God fearing people u know!!

I can understand why this operation registers a number of cases in US. Women there have it just to please their partners. Recently read an article about an American women going for a $5000 hymenoplasty surgery on the 40^th birthday of her husband so that he could have a mind-boggling experience. What a birthday gift! But in India a lot of women undergo the same surgery to escape the social wrath associated with their husband’s discovery that his bride was not a virgin. In many societies, including India, an `intact' hymen is considered proof of sexual inexperience. Well in a country where half of the population is literate, people still are unaware that this hymen rupture can happen also because of involvement in physical activities like sports or acts of self-pleasure!!!

I can imagine a lot of individuals crying over the male chauvinism that rules this society but I can say that even those women will not hesitate to have hymenoplasty. Aren’t they propagating the same chauvinism theory by doing this? Why not let those men go to hell who put more stress on your past rather than thinking about the wonderful time that they can have with you in the moments of togetherness that you will have in future? Isn’t hymenoplasty giving a boost to the already much hyped male ego? Men always know that no one in this cosmos can question their virginity and it’s impossible to prove it at all. So, they pounce on any opportunity that is presented to them and get themselves satisfied and those same set of hungry jerks expect their future spouses to have that piece of skin still intact till they blow that off! Dr David Matlock surely would have had a pro-women heart coz without that it wasn’t even feasible at all to think of pioneering something such as hymenoplasty. A nice way to fool the jerks :)

I have always believed that virginity is not dignity; it’s nothing more than just a lack of opportunity. Well if you are into a relationship and you think that you have a fair bit of commitment towards your partner then it’s obvious that you will look forward to him/her to satisfy your sexual needs as well and not hope for their friends to do so.(Though in some cases this might be true even). So what is wrong if you loose your virginity to someone you are truly, madly and deeply in love with? This can only be wrong if you have been sleeping around with almost everyone it’s possible with and without even thinking for a single moment about your future. And after all what’s the point in getting a piece of skin sewed back just to get it blown away in a single push! Well even this can be justified if you are planning to hide your past from your beloved which in itself is something which has to be thought off. Past is something from which we should learn and not something which needs to be ashamed off. Why feel sorry for those moments which at their time of occurrence might have been the best moments of one’s lives? After all who thinks of getting detached while being attached?

I would love to see a girl who goes to bed with a clear objective in mind. (Well you must be thinking that there is only one single objective!). Is this act of hers just an act of pleasure or is a step that takes her closer to her partner in the relationship? If it’s by her wish than she is the one who should accept the responsibility of this act. I know some of them who think that if they won’t have sex with their boyfriend he will dump them. Well my lady friends if this really is the case I would again like to re-iterate; throw them out of your lives! I live in a city which is supposed to be one the most modern cities in this country and for some of the girls here it might not sound to be a cool idea to be a virgin (Oh shit! Don’t tell me you are a virgin? I can hear this!!!!)

So, one’s idea of virginity is directly proportional (Don’t crib about the usage of words please! I am an engineer) to what he or she has been exposed to since their childhood. Some might associate it with the religious beliefs that he or she might have had. For some it might be something to boast off as for them sex is too big an issue. Some might be looking to get rid off this as quickly as possible as this is the only thing that they have been thinking of since they became aware of it. As long as the reasons and after effects of it are clear in the minds of those who opt for hymenoplasty, I have no issues at all. After all who am I to comment on the thought process of those to whom I am remotely associated!!!